The Ironist

Differing Perspectives

The Angel of the Archive: The Synod of the Left Shoe

Jonathan Bennet talks about surefooted stances in the world of shoes and the not-so-surefooted stances of those who argue about them.

Among the lesser church councils of the thirteenth century—those trivial, haphazard regional gatherings of abbots and prelates convened more for the airing of personal grievances than for matters of doctrine—none is more obscure, nor so unnecessary, as the Synod of the Left Shoe (Concilium Calcei Sinistri), held in the winter of 1249 at the Abbey of St. Guntram-the-Irascible in Lorraine.

The official records were lost, presumably because no one thought them worth preserving. What remains is a biting summary appended to the Chronicon Fabricatum of one Brother Anselm the Less:

What kind of an Ironist are You?

Take the quiz and find out.

“In that year, the abbots and provincials gathered to resolve the matter of monastic footwear, following rumors that certain brethren of the Cistercian order had taken to putting on their left shoe before the right, in violation of the Rule of St Benedict (or, more precisely, in violation of Abbot Humbert’s copious commentaries on the Rule, which were actually a rebuttal of an infamous tractate by a long-dead bishop of Germelshausen, which itself may have been a satire).”

The debate reportedly lasted three days.

On the first, the Prior of Verdun argued that the right foot signified the magisterial nature of Christ and therefore ought to be shod first. The Abbot of Compiègne countered that leftness, as a sign of humility, was more appropriate to monks, who “must always incline toward the lesser path.”

On the second, a learned Brother Odo of Metz proposed a compromise: that both shoes be donned simultaneously. After several failed demonstrations (and one injury), this was deemed “contrary to both piety and nature.”

On the third day, a vote was taken and promptly declared inconclusive when it was discovered that no one had brought parchment to record the tally. The council dissolved in acrimony, having achieved nothing—except that a certain Minorite friar was reportedly seen afterward removing both shoes entirely and declaring himself “apostolically barefoot.”

A marginal note in a later manuscript of the Rule of Benedict, likely added by a frustrated scribe, reads:

“May God deliver us from shoes and those who argue about them.”

Modern scholars remain divided on whether the Synod ever occurred.

Contributed by
Jonathan Bennett

Author

  • Mr. Jonathan Bennett is a historian by education, a chef by profession, and an ironist by necessity. Once on a trajectory toward a lucrative career in law, he took a sharp turn into the far less profitable (but arguably more flavorful) world of fine dining. After tiring of crafting exquisite dishes for a pittance, he found himself cooking for a less discerning clientele beyond the Arctic Circle - as with most of his life, an existential joke not lost on him.

    His passions lie in history, particularly the Middle Ages, Byzantium, and the Renaissance. As well, he is drawn to religion, art, literature, and certain esoteric interests best discussed over a strong drink (or two). A seasoned traveler, he is equally at home everywhere from fine Viennese cafés to alchemist’s dens beneath the streets of Prague, crumbling ruins high in the Caucasus mountains, and the labyrinthine alleys of Old Damascus. Despite being voted in high school as both ‘most likely to become a third-world dictator’ AND ‘most likely to become a monk’, neither fate has yet come to pass. He resides part of the time in Montreal, where he continues to indulge in debates – usually defending causes long since lost.

From San Blas to Oxford: A Review of Shooting Up

From San Blas to Oxford: A Review of Shooting Up

A missionary family raises four boys in one of Madrid's most drug-ravaged neighbourhoods. Jonathan Tepper's memoir traces an extraordinary journey. Jonathan Tepper’s Shooting Up is much more than the account of four brothers in a missionary family growing up in Spain...

The Celestial Bureaucracy: Hierarchies of Angels

The Celestial Bureaucracy: Hierarchies of Angels

In her third post, Dr. Hara tells us how Seraphim came to outrank Cherubim, and Archangels ended up near the bottom. In the previous essay, we traced the angel’s transformation from local guardian spirit to cosmic warrior under the influence of Zoroastrian dualism....

WORDS, WORDS, WORDS III

WORDS, WORDS, WORDS III

This is the third essay by Peter as part of The Ironist’s continuing series of articles on language and literature. Polonius: What do you read, my lord? Hamlet: Words, words, words. Polonius: What is the matter, my lord? Hamlet: Between who? Polonius: I mean, the...